I'm back and ready to unpack
Three years later and I’m back, reviving what was was once a lightly written in blog.
I’ve thought about doing this for some time now. I’ve always found the idea of it appealing, however daunting it feels to me. I’ve never had the patience to journal. Often during the week I’ll get drawn into thoughts that I feel I want to write about and I make notes to come back to later. Then I always put it off. Because how could I ever truly get the entirety of my feelings and thoughts out in exactly the way I want them to be communicated? That dark pit of perfectionism, what an endless hole that is!
But I like writing and it’s rewarding. It’s transformative and therapeutic. When I read back on some of what I’ve posted before, I am incredibly moved to be reminded of what it was like to be me at a certain time in a certain stage of my life. It’s a pretty amazing time capsule.
And the crossover with social, being able to share and connect with others, is rewarding as well. Over the years people have mentioned to me my posts about my mother when I least expect it, and it has truly blown me away how simple words can touch others in profound ways. Oddly, at the same time, I’ve always been scared of what other people think. Scared of myself, scared of my voice. I’ve often doubted the value of what I have to offer, subconsciously always with a ‘not good enough’ feeling. I’ve been trying to push myself past that. What I have to offer is me.
Here we are having almost completed 2020. A shit show. It has turned everything upside down and burned things to the ground in many ways, professionally and personally. I miss the nonstop travel, work on work, living on adrenaline, endless opportunity life. I have now grieved the loss of this life and I accept that it will likely not be the same. Because on the other end of this ordeal, I will be different. Time will have continued and I’ll be older. There’s been a lot of reflection and transformation this year.
So this is all to say, that here I am writing in this blog because I want to. There will be some recurring themes here:
Life, death, grief, humanity, relationships, exploration of my mortality.
Entrepreneurship, building a brand, managing a team and other business things.
Community, culture and my South Asian American identity.
Sometimes I will write well. Sometimes it will be messy. This is a place for me to document, share and learn. To unpack whatever it is I want to. Some of it will be precious and some of it will be light. If you want to come along I’d be excited to have you on this journey. <3