Be thankful.

Sometimes I find her looking at me. When our eyes meet she smiles as if to make me feel better. She remembers all my nicknames and tells me, "Meri Jaan, meri behthi. Humailee tailee, Humi meri.' I can't find words to describe it all. 

I find that writing these things down gives me some sort of clarity. I have started documenting through photos and words all the nice moments and all the terrible moments. My feelings, my thoughts.

There are so many things I am thankful for. I am thankful that I have my siblings to lean on. I am thankful for my wonderful, supportive and loving husband who pushes me to be a better, more compassionate person every day. I am thankful that the company I work for and all my colleagues are so supportive and understanding. My job has allowed me to work remotely and they have shown nothing but concern and love for me and my family. I am just thankful that I can find some good from this situation. 

I truly believe that since my mother's diagnosis, in Sept 2014, that I have become a better person. I am not the best person, but I am better. All I want to do is to love. There is an urgency in my spirit. I want to do something meaningful with my life. I want to help others. There will be highs and there will be lows but we must take responsibility for what we do with those. Yes, we know life is short. Yes, we know the cliches. Fight against the bad human instincts and faults and try your hardest to be happy with who you are. Figure out what really matters. I'm not religious, but I do believe in soul. Do good, be gentle and show compassion. 

The road ahead may be long. It may short. But I know it will be hard. I am ready to do what I can for the people I love.

Remember: We must be brave, have an open mind and keep things in perspective.